Top Ten Things To Do Other Than Pee On The Potty:
1. Tear 18 million tiny pieces of toilet paper up and throw half into the toilet and half onto the floor...for decoration.
2. Adjust toilet paper bar up and down, up and down, up and down....to ensure you are responsible for the first incidence of re-drywalling in our new home.
3. Fake Mama out by grunting and groaning loudly...when she comes she will discover that instead of using the potty to poo, you were just pulling off your socks.
4. Sing your ABC'S as loudly as possible...surely this must be the appropriate time and place to practice them.
5. Pull open and empty the convenient little drawer right next to the potty that Mama has stocked with necessary bathroom essentials.
6. Pick at your toenails. After all, you went through so much grunting and groaning (see #3) to get your socks off you may as well make good use of the freed toes opportunity.
7. Pick your nose. Might as well.
8. Notice that Mama forgot to move the soap dispenser out of reach and attempt a hand soap pumps-per-minute record.
9. Gleefully discover that if you can scoot your Cars potty seat back far enough you can play in the toilet water WITH YOUR HANDS! Score!
10. With your new found toilet water access, splash a bunch of the toilet water on the floor. Being that there's a bunch of soap on it already (see #8) you might as well help Mama out a bit and do some mopping. I am certain she would appreciate using toilet water for floor cleaning purposes.
(MAYBE) 11. If you have to, I guess you could pee...but just a little bit, you need to save a whole bunch to wash your Lightening McQueen underwear with. He's been looking like he needs a bath...
A
Too funny, love your list. Thanks for stopping by today.
ReplyDeleteThat is hysterical! We've got peeing down pat but I could make a Top Ten Things to Do Instead of Pooping list!!
ReplyDeleteOh goodness!!! That is too funny:) Although, I know in that moment it is anything BUT funny!! I'm sure it will get better soon! Thanks for stopping by blog too:)
ReplyDeleteOR...you know, you could leave four pounds of toilet paper on Auntie Mimi's bathroom floor! LOL :) I was hoping we'd make it the rest of the month, but I made Nat run to the store today to buy more toilet paper. Bubba...I still love ya boy! What other choice do I have when you make me love you so much??? :)
ReplyDeleteToddler boys...aren't they fun. Toddler + Toilet = Priceless!
ReplyDeleteLOL Been there done that NUMEROUS times and will be doing that again with two more soon FUN FUN FUN! I will be reading to brush up and get any new tips!
ReplyDeleteWhat a hoot! Before kids I would have thought this was one of those things people make up to be funny, but now I know it's so very very true. Good luck with the pee business!
ReplyDeleteI promise it does get better. Or maybe it just gets . . . different. I have a 6 year old boy and while he now thinks playing in the potty is gross he still does things that make me wonder.
ReplyDeleteFunny!!! Thanks for sharing your list. It would link up nicely with my Make Me Laugh Monday. Happy belated Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteThis is hysterical. I sat here and read it as my husband was getting ready for work. He kept asking, "What are you laughing at?" What a great way to start my day.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this and for visiting me this morning.
Miss ya, A.
ReplyDelete