Jeans of Perfection Svelteness

I have been on a Jeans Of Perfection quest for quite awhile. I tend to have a difficult time finding jeans, being that I am oddly shaped. No, I am not some freakazoid, I'm just pear shaped. Anybody have the "gap at the back" problem like I do?

Here is my simple list of jean requirements :

• Dark wash, but not black
• Slight fading, but not so much it looks like I sat on a chair covered in wet white paint
• No butt flap pockets..HELLO, don't accentuate that which you want minimized!
• Boot-cut, trouser-style cross breed
• Perfect length (for me that means an inch off the floor when I'm wearing heels
• Hidden/side front pockets...once again, don't accentuate that which you want minimized
• NO GAP AT THE BACK
• Slenderizing...uh...DUH
• able to put on without lying on a bed and sucking in
• no major butt decoration, such as logos swirly designs, etc.
• cheap
  

So, with that exhaustive list in mind, I set out with my MIL and sister Joanie. First we went to the Gap ( get it? Don't want a gap in back? Go to the Gap. Ok, dumb humor, whatever. )

I tried on every single style except skinny jeans, because THIS pear shape just doesn't go there. Trends have to be at least 3ish years old before I can commit. Because that means they change from trends to style. I think... even then I still have to ask my Beautificationist if I look ok.

Ok, back to the Gap. So, my dear MIL brings me these jeans to just try on. Came out of the dressing room to looks of appreciation for my svelte figure. Heeheehee...I am NOT svelte. But, the jeans helped me look more svelte than normal. Here they are, whatddya think?




Pretty cool, huh? Here's a shot of the back pocket, and the full back shot:


And OK, they have a SLIGHT gap at the back, but they fit really well, and I feel beautiful in them, so I bought them :)

Also, they didn't quite satisfy the last requirement, which required an A-OK from the hubby, but I got them and am reveling in my Jeans of Perfection Svelteness.

Now, if only I had new shoes to wear with them......and a cool shirt too.... and maybe a new purse.... and maybe an updated haircut....and what about jewelry?

Ok, time to snap out of it and get back to the real world of wiping nose drool off my kid and doing laundry.

A

Teeees

Jude and I go on a daily (tire out the baby before he naps) walk around our apartment complex. He knows we're going outside when I pull out his socks, shoes, hat and coat. He sits patiently waiting for his socks and shoes to go on, helps me with his coat, and tolerates his hat. He runs to the door while I get my keys ready to lock it, for he takes off running as soon as the door opens.

He runs right to this big tree outside our apartment.

He says "teeees" and pats it and feels the bark.

Sometimes he plays peekaboo with me.

See the white adirondack chair? More to come on that subject later.

Look Mama, an airplane!

(Mama's thinking about dirty jeans and muddy shoes right now.)

Ooh, MORE teeees!

Here I go! Catch me Mama!

Here's to a LOOONG nap.

A

Klutzyness

I looked up the word klutz at Dictionary.com because the little spell-check icon hasn't been working on blogger. Here is their definition:

1. a clumsy, awkward person.
2. a stupid or foolish person; blockhead

I am a HUGE klutz. Meaning the first definition. I don't think I am stupid or foolish, OR a blockhead, but a clumsy, awkward person? Uh huh.

I usually have a bunch of bruises of unknown origin. And just for the record, no, my husband doesn't hit me.

Lance looked at the multi-colored beauty by my knee..."where'd that one come from?". I don't know....the wall, the chair, the table, the coffee-table, the park bench that I slid off of yesterday morning on my run?

Wednesday morning I took Jude out in the stoller for a good run on the trail. I've been trying to keep my distance down because of my little issue, so only went a few miles.

I DO need to build up my leg strength so I ran to a bench to do some good leg step-ups (not sure what the official term is, but that's what I call em). I usually do 2 sets of 20 for each leg.

It was quite cold, and I was looking rather sporty chic in my cute workout pants/winter running top ensemble. See? New top! And ON SALE. ( They must be good, all they have left are extended sizes ).

Anyways, Jude was watching me from his stroller doing my step-ups when my foot slid off the edge of the bench and through the gap between the seat part and the back support part. I think I yelped, I'm not sure. I landed on my butt with my legs straddling the seat. I tried to get up at quickly as possible to save my 'I'm so cool in my outside workout gear' image. Unfortunately, a cyclist saw the whole thing and grinned as he sped past me. Ayyyyye.

Poor Jude, he just watched me, not really knowing what happened. Just you wait little one. Your Mama will probably embarrass you on an alarmingly frequent basis.

After all, I have a Mom who would publicly embarrass me just for kicks. She would see me walking with my friends in the mall and yell my name and do jumping jacks, while her sisters bust out laughing.

Gotta pass on the family traditions and values...

A